The other day I was going through an article in the news paper about the fat weddings fad in the NCR..with average wedding cost going over 7-8 Lakhs..
“The set up for the wedding pandal and other arrangements could easily cost over 20Lakh for a not so posh wedding..n it could shoot up to 50Lakh as well..”. Hey mom..thats definitely n times my annual salary package…i told my mom laughing…
My uncle who was listening all this, replied smiling “beta..dhoom dhaam se shaadi ho to duniya bhi yaad rakhti hai”.. “okie, agreed in a sense” I smiled back..
I ignored what my uncle said but over the time this thought turned out to be quite bitter..is it like ppl have really started earning so much or its merely a showoff thing..
Again I have bollywood to blame, they never show a simple wedding. Having costly set ups is perhaps an obligation for them..and Indian public is foolish enough to follow them suit :)
Does all this pomp and show help a couple in having a better understanding? With over 50% of Indian marriages ending up in divorce..i don’t think that it’s a good idea to go for a posh wedding..
I still remember..while sitting idle in wedding negotiations for my cousin sister, her would be MIL instructed.. “bhai sahib humare parivar aur bete k friend circle me sabhi highly educated aur class 1 ufcer hain...zara khane pine k arrangement pe special dhyan dijiyega”
My cousin brother took me aside and whispered “hmm..budiya ground bana rahi hai..achee len den ka” ..i said to myself.. “hey, when did a highly educated circle started going only to a posh wedding?”
After that the negotiations started and everything was being jotted down..typical filmy ishtyle.. “dekhiye hume apne liye to kuch nahi chahiye..bhagwan ka diya sab hai..” the girl would need this, that and so on….
A few months back..a very good friend of mine who happens to work in a call center met me to invite me for her wedding..
“So, you would continue in this job after marriage?” I asked her..
“Yeah, my in laws don’t have any objections” she said with gleam in her eyes...
“Hey, this job would be really tiring for you..isn’t it?” I questioned again..
“Hum chahte hain..ki ladki shadi k baad khali nahi baithe, ghar ka kaam to itna hai nahi..job karegi to char paise bhi bacha legi apne liye” is what she told about her in law’s views..
Just four my months after her wedding we met again..and this time she was looking a bit dull..no signs of that “bridal blissful look”..
“Is everything fine with you?, howz your married life going dear?” I questioned..
“My life is going okie..but in laws really suck..they are greedy types..”
“What happened” I said..
“See, I do all the household stuff..along with my job..but still my in laws crib over small things”
“They expected some more money in the wedding?” I inquired again..
“pata nahi yaar..i too thought like this..and started handing over all my salary to my MIL but still they are not very happy with me..i think its all destiny, achaa sasuraal bahut kismet waliyon ko milta hai..tu apna bata na..kaisa hai..howz ur new job..” she tried changing the topic..
All I could do was..to offer a few words of sympathy towards my friend..
Omg..her wedding was really a posh one..i still remember her saying.. “mai apna bhi kafi paisa laga rahi hun shadi me..along with my parents..shaadi kafi dhoom dhaam se hai”
Not even her or her parents would have imagined about the after effects of the wedding…
“Is the groom responsible in such matters?..i question myself”
Yeah..more than 100%..i think..
Anyway..had it been in my hands I would teach all such people some good lessons of being in a responsible society..
Can’t change the society in a night though….
For now, I can assure myself… “Whenever I get married..it should be simple one..no pomp and show business for me”
And yes, “ I would make sure that my bride settles happily in her new home” ;)
Any listeners?? :-)
“The set up for the wedding pandal and other arrangements could easily cost over 20Lakh for a not so posh wedding..n it could shoot up to 50Lakh as well..”. Hey mom..thats definitely n times my annual salary package…i told my mom laughing…
My uncle who was listening all this, replied smiling “beta..dhoom dhaam se shaadi ho to duniya bhi yaad rakhti hai”.. “okie, agreed in a sense” I smiled back..
I ignored what my uncle said but over the time this thought turned out to be quite bitter..is it like ppl have really started earning so much or its merely a showoff thing..
Again I have bollywood to blame, they never show a simple wedding. Having costly set ups is perhaps an obligation for them..and Indian public is foolish enough to follow them suit :)
Does all this pomp and show help a couple in having a better understanding? With over 50% of Indian marriages ending up in divorce..i don’t think that it’s a good idea to go for a posh wedding..
I still remember..while sitting idle in wedding negotiations for my cousin sister, her would be MIL instructed.. “bhai sahib humare parivar aur bete k friend circle me sabhi highly educated aur class 1 ufcer hain...zara khane pine k arrangement pe special dhyan dijiyega”
My cousin brother took me aside and whispered “hmm..budiya ground bana rahi hai..achee len den ka” ..i said to myself.. “hey, when did a highly educated circle started going only to a posh wedding?”
After that the negotiations started and everything was being jotted down..typical filmy ishtyle.. “dekhiye hume apne liye to kuch nahi chahiye..bhagwan ka diya sab hai..” the girl would need this, that and so on….
A few months back..a very good friend of mine who happens to work in a call center met me to invite me for her wedding..
“So, you would continue in this job after marriage?” I asked her..
“Yeah, my in laws don’t have any objections” she said with gleam in her eyes...
“Hey, this job would be really tiring for you..isn’t it?” I questioned again..
“Hum chahte hain..ki ladki shadi k baad khali nahi baithe, ghar ka kaam to itna hai nahi..job karegi to char paise bhi bacha legi apne liye” is what she told about her in law’s views..
Just four my months after her wedding we met again..and this time she was looking a bit dull..no signs of that “bridal blissful look”..
“Is everything fine with you?, howz your married life going dear?” I questioned..
“My life is going okie..but in laws really suck..they are greedy types..”
“What happened” I said..
“See, I do all the household stuff..along with my job..but still my in laws crib over small things”
“They expected some more money in the wedding?” I inquired again..
“pata nahi yaar..i too thought like this..and started handing over all my salary to my MIL but still they are not very happy with me..i think its all destiny, achaa sasuraal bahut kismet waliyon ko milta hai..tu apna bata na..kaisa hai..howz ur new job..” she tried changing the topic..
All I could do was..to offer a few words of sympathy towards my friend..
Omg..her wedding was really a posh one..i still remember her saying.. “mai apna bhi kafi paisa laga rahi hun shadi me..along with my parents..shaadi kafi dhoom dhaam se hai”
Not even her or her parents would have imagined about the after effects of the wedding…
“Is the groom responsible in such matters?..i question myself”
Yeah..more than 100%..i think..
Anyway..had it been in my hands I would teach all such people some good lessons of being in a responsible society..
Can’t change the society in a night though….
For now, I can assure myself… “Whenever I get married..it should be simple one..no pomp and show business for me”
And yes, “ I would make sure that my bride settles happily in her new home” ;)
Any listeners?? :-)
